On Orgasm Control

saint madoc — Thu, 04 Mar 2021 21:02:54 +0000

My Dearest Thandi,
I do frequently think on variations of lovemaking with you. After counseling so many people on their sexual proclivities, I often consider momentarily how I could perhaps make things more interesting for the both of us.
While I imagine the typical scenarios often, I do wonder if you would lend me a degree of control. It sounds indelicate, but I would like to make you beg for me to let you come. I know, I know, wouldn’t most men enjoy hearing their partners beg for relief? But I mean this in a rather cruel way. I want to make you feel so good that it’s nearly torture. That in the moment, you’re so out of your mind for me to allow you to come that you try to fuck the very air.
There is a practice called edging, my love. I wonder if you would have heard of it. The process is to bring you to near-orgasm repeatedly, until you’re nothing but a trembling pile of want. The sensitivity of your body increases with each repetition. It builds up and up and up until relief is brought in the form of a good come.
Gods, Thandi, it gets me hard to think about it. I have practiced it on myself, imagining you here— yes, I would be willing to trade places and let you be the one to inflict the condition— and each time I practice on myself, I get more excited to use my experience on you. Of course, I need to familiarize myself with how your body reacts to my teasing and touching.
And of course, it may take time to get there. I’ve no clue if or when you will read this, so perhaps I will have already done it by the time you read this. Or perhaps you will read and want to try it? I imagine you asking so prettily with those excited eyes of yours. Curious, excited, embarrassed all at once. It’s adorable. You were always so adorable when we spoke of intimacy before.
To be able to exercise control over your body in such a way… I’m not entirely certain why it excites me. Perhaps the trust in me. Perhaps the idea that you would be begging me to pleasure you. Perhaps the reward of hearing you at the end. Perhaps the satisfaction that I’ve served you well as a lover and know you so intimately.
Regardless.
There are certain things I would like to try. Of course, I will wait to try them— a first time together should be nothing but pure love and passion and adoration, I think. I want to follow the mood and need for the first time. And I imagine we both would be nervous. And perhaps I think more on it than you. Though… five years changes someone a lot. Will you be disappointed to find me different from the Charlie you knew? Will you be upset to meet a man who wants to hear you beg him for satisfaction rather than the demure and prudish one of times past?
Knowing you and loving you has created such a demand in me, my love. My wants and needs have only multiplied with the years. I’ve gone from a thoroughly asexual creature to a man who is determined to make sure that his wife enjoys the process of lovemaking on our journey to the family we want.
I suppose there isn’t much point in speculating. I simply hope that when we meet again, you simply find more to love than disappointment.
Much love,
Your Charlie

edging – Good Saint Madoc

On Orgasm Control